I was inspired to write this blog post for many reasons, but specifically for the people who struggle with prioritizing self-care and accountability in relationships (with others or yourself.)
When I say people who don’t prioritize self-care, I’m not talking about getting their nails done or using a bath bomb after a long workday.
I’m talking about the hard things that make our health and wellbeing better in the long run. Not exercising and trashing your body through your self talk. To put off health checks for a medical concern. When somebody is struggling emotionally but decides to put off therapy or doesn’t find a coping strategy. Avoiding a hard conversation. Feeling resentment in a relationship but not establishing boundaries.
There are many things we know logically that we need to do, that we may struggle with or avoid. Just like in childhood when we were told to go to school on a day we much rather lay in bed, the adult version of us will also experience feelings of protest.
I chose these two videos because I thought they were great examples of how we can parent ourselves emotionally and physically. They have two different totally approaches with a common theme. Which one resonates more with you?
1. Acknowledge that we all have an inner child.
2. Recognize and explore big reactions or feelings we’re having to events. (Especially if the reaction intensity doesn’t match what happened. For example, crying and yelling because a dish was broken by accident.)
3. Figure out the need that your inner child is experiencing.
Parenting yourself as an act of self-love. It’s not selfish. You don’t tell a child that they are selfish when they tell you they are hungry. If they are relying on you to feed them, they need to eat or they will be malnourished.
Why do we have such a hard time applying us to ourselves? Why don’t we respond to ourselves with the love, empathy, and compassion we give to little kids?
Love is shown in multiple ways. It’s not just love, hugs, and kind words. You don’t force a kid to do their homework because you want them to suffer. You love your child and want them to succeed. You believe in their abilities to learn. You hold them accountable to their homework, because you love them.
Can you think of a way that you can lovingly parent yourself?